happy birthday to me

hello blog world..imaginary audience...fantasy soapbox
I wanted to publicly open up about something cool that happened today.
I recognized that I had let go of a lot of expectation and was able to be in the moment and love "what is".
How very zen of me.
I woke up to being 52 this morning. There was a message on my phone from my singing dad that went like this:
 Happy birthday to you,
 You are fifty two
You look more like forty
And I'm proud of you.
After some name calling text messages (to ease the pain of age?)...my sister, Jackie and I hooked up for breakfast. I was so happy she mentioned it was my birthday to our server so I could have a free piece of pie...Hawaiian Strawberry to be exact...but even more happy to spend infinite time with this gem of a friend. She always knows the right things to say.
I gave up an impromptu lunch date with my first born..but we stretch out birthdays in our family, so I will be seeing him soon...it's BIRTHDAY MONTH, damnit!!
I got to spend a little time with my youngest spawn since he came home early from a work trip. I marveled to Baylee about expectations..and taking what comes and just being happy to be alive and spending time with people I love.
Which reminds me...
I will be picked up shortly to have dinner with my cute mom and dad and my "next to" sister I share a birthday month with AND shared a room with for many years. Back then, it was annoying to have to share. Today..wah lah!!! I am in a place where it doesn't all have to be about me.
How did this happen?
How did I come to love the moments and the people and not judge so much and not compare so much and not want all the attention?
I wish I could explain it better...
Or better yet...wrap it up and give it to whoever needs it.
And you won't know you needed it til you have it. And that's the grandest surprise of all.
I am pretty sure grace has fallen over me today..after a month ..wait...a year of lots and lots of shit.
I am so blessed to have this much love and light in my plain old ordinary world.
Happy FREAKING birth day to me.

p.s. Tony took me to training table as soon as we both had free spots in our day at the same time.an impromptu date never the less.. ..look at this handsome boy who will turn 32 at the end of this month..love him.